Saturday, 6 June 2009

How Paleo/Primal are You? Answer these 8 Questions to Find Out...

You scored: out of a possible 24.Oh dear - you are not very Paleo / Primal at all. You should consider taking a look at Paleo/Primal in a Nutshell Part 1 and Part 2 and reading the material on this site!

Congratulations - you have a healthy mix of pragmatism and Paleo / Primal instinct.

Yikes! Have you considered you may be taking things a little too far?

Here are 8 questions to test just how Primal/Paleo you are.

Please note, this is just for fun! All possible answers are intended light-heartedly and certainly not in any way a recommendation for how you should behave!
At a Restaurant.You are at a restaurant. You like the look of the chicken but it comes with fries. Do you:
Eat the fries, order a side of garlic bread, then chow down on a slab of cheesecake to follow.
Ask the waiter to substitute extra vegetables or salad for the fries.
You are not at the restaurant. Cavemen did not have them so you would never eat in one. Besides, your loin cloth does not meet their dress code.
Feeling Hungry.You are out walking in your neighbourhood and realise you are hungry. Do you:
Buy a bag of potato chips and a chocolate bar at the nearest shop.
See whether the shop has something Paleo, like unsalted nuts - otherwise wait until lunch.
Lure the neighbour’s cat with the promise of affection, kill it with your bare hands, then use your pocket knife to skin and eat it.
Seeing the Doctor.Your doctor says your total cholesterol reading came back high and wants to put you on statins and a low fat diet. Do you:
Agree without question.
Thank him/her for the advice, but instead go on a broadly Paleo/Primal diet, based on what you’ve read about cholesterol and the best diet for a healthy heart.
Bludgeon him to death with his rolodex and scrawl the words ‘bad medicine’ in blood on his office wall.
Shopping. You are at the supermarket. You want to buy some chicken for dinner. Do you:
Buy the cheapest chicken you can find.
Look for an organic, free-range bird, but if you can’t find one, decide to shop elsewhere.
You are not in the supermarket. You are chasing birds in the park while worried parents gather their children.
Working Out. You are thinking about your workouts for the coming week...
What’s to think about? You’ve been doing the same 5-days-a-week, 60-minute cardio workout for years.
You have a rough idea what you’ll do but it depends how you feel. Maybe 2 or 3 short, intense, interval-based intense sessions - sprinting, bodyweight, dumbbell work – or maybe swimming or another sport.
You have no idea. It just happens. You may show your boss you can throw a full water cooler bottle across the office. Or fight a neighbour with whose partner you declared a wish to ‘mate’.
Surprise Meal. Your new partner has prepared a surprise meal for you – nachos slathered in melted cheese to start, risotto main course and apple pie with custard for dessert. Do you:
Devour every available morsel, leaving your plate cleaner than it started.
Do your best not to hurt his/her feelings, but try not to eat too much - perhaps say you ate a lot earlier because you didn’t expect the surprise.
Overturn the dinner table in righteous anger, deliver a 15-minute tirade accusing him/her of attempted poisoning, then leave, never to return.
Talking to Vegans. You are chatting with some vegan friends. Do you:
Tell them you wish you could be vegan, but you enjoy junk food too much.
Explain the philosophy behind Paleo/Primal, but also say you appreciate their moral courage.
You don’t have any vegan friends. Last time you met vegans you harangued them until they cried and left a kilo of giblets on their windscreen in the morning.
Dinner with Friends.You and your partner are invited to dinner at the house of friends. Do you:
Take along a bottle of Baileys and a cheesecake like a Humvee’s wheel to guarantee a gargantuan sugar binge.
Politely warn them about your preferences ahead of the meal so they can cook you extra meat and vegetables and perhaps make a fruit salad.
You were not invited in the first place. All your friends got sick of your interminable rants about modern food and stopped asking you round.


Jedidja said...

Awesome :) Very funny stuff.

I would like another option for the chicken question:

You remember you have chickens in your freezer that you grew yourself and decide to thaw one out instead.


Methuselah said...

Jedidja - I am always envious when I hear about people who are growing / rearing their own, especially in beautiful locations. I bet those chickens taste out of this world. Hope you will keep posting about their progress.

Asclepius said...

Very funny. I liked Q2 - reckon the veggie-malitia/ALF will be after you though!

Asclepius said...

Forgot to add, 18/24!

Methuselah said...

Asclepius - 18 - what were your #3 responses? Wait, don't tell me... fighting with the neighbour?

Jeff said...


Vin - NaturalBias said...

While I think the doctor who is eager to prescribe statins should be bludgeoned with a rolodex, or at least a thick prescription pad, perhaps that's a bit too mean. ;)

Funny stuff!

Anonymous said...

nice. btw I have that evolution of man print out proudly posted on my cube wall. Prolly irks the coworkers who are tending toward the guy with the soda.

Methuselah said...

Thanks all - glad you enjoyed.

Andy, great idea sticking that poster on the wall. Did you print it or buy it? Could be a business opportunity for someone if they started selling them ;-)

Anonymous said...

I stumbled upon your blog recently and as a primal noob, I find your posts very informative. This is a fun post - my score: 16/24.


john_b_eats said...

Thanks for some great fun to start the week!!

Yummy said...

Hehe! You are so funny!
I really feel like doing the #3 choice for a workout today! Mondays...blah.

Chris - said...

Nice! 17/24. According to the picture I just figured out how to use tools, probably to spear the neighbors.

Anonymous said...

M - a while back I was searching at work for some evolutionary pictures. I can't remember where I found it, but had to print it out immediately after I found it!

Methuselah said...

Thanks all - glad you enjoyed the survey. Now that I have the technology to do these, let me know if you have any ideas for other surveys.

Andy - thanks - I may do the same.

Primal Toad said...

I absolutely loved taking this primal/paleo quiz.

loved the humor :)

Methuselah said...

Thanks PT!

Mike Norris said...

Great quiz!You've got a lot of entertaining Paleo stuff here!

Methuselah said...

Thanks Mike.

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