|Linda Van Horn, Chair of the USDA-appointed 2010 Dietary Guidelines Advisory Committee|
In 2009 I am going to turn the USDA food pyramid on its head by persuading my committee to stop recommending people's diet include so much brown, starchy carbohydrate. I can see the evidence is starting to point towards a sea change in nutritional best practice and rather than wait for the bureaucratic oil-tanker to turn around I intend to set the cat amongst the pigeons by arguing vehemently against the compromising of my committee's objectivity by the agricultural department and industry lobbies.
|Andrew Wadge Chief Scientist at the UK Food Standards Agency|
In 2009 I am going to stop publishing the eatwell plate on our website and ask my people to review the evidence for its composition. I have realised that the recommendation for bread, rice and pasta as a huge proportion of the ideal diet is based not on evidence but history - we've always eaten food in those proportions therefore it must be the right diet. I know I will probably lose my job because there will be outrage and confusion, but I am going to do it anyway because I know the long term health benefits to emerge from the mayhem will in the long term make it worthwhile.
|Robert Mugabe, president of Zimbabwe|
In 2009 am going to take early retirement and begin a career writing children's books.
|Osama bin Laden, leader of Al Qaeda|
In 2009 I am going to turn myself in. I am sick of living in caves and my friend Ahmed told me they have running water and cable at Guantanamo.